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Writer's pictureSara Winder

Life Lessons from A Horse Trainer

Over the years of working with horses, I have been able to identify and apply simple lessons that I learned from horses, to my relationships. Hopefully you too can gain something from this, whether it be how to better understand your horse, your friend, your spouse, kids, or family members.



  1. You never know what or who you are dealing with right up front, You test ride a horse and he is on his best behavior, you bring him home and 2 weeks later he is stubborn, inconsistent, or decides to ram you into the trees.

  2. There is no such thing as a perfect horse, friend, spouse, etc.If you don’t like something about the horse, friend, spouse, etc, and you decide to get rid of them and get a new one, there will still be a problem, because nobody is perfect. It may not be the same flaw, but now you have to take the time to figue out what the flaw is and decide if it is more or less tolerable than the other flaws you dealt with.

  3. We all speak different languages, horses/people, men/women, friends/friends, we must learn to communicate effectively with each other before we can develop and maintain a solid relationship. If I get on a horse and immediately give him leg to ask him to walk, and he takes off at a canter, or turns left, that means he does not understand you. If you don’t take the time to get to know him and learn to communicate with each other, you will always have a horse, spouse, friend, etc. that doesn’t listen and will eventually become frustrated with how you treat them and dump you in the dirt.

  4. Always be kind. Although kindness does not always yield the desired results, it still makes you a good person. Be kind to animals, people, spouses, etc., even when they aren’t kind to you. You never know what they have been through, or what they are going through.

  5. Patience is always welcome. Whether you are taking the time to teach a horse a new maneuver step by step, or teaching your child how to do something, or even helping your spouse back into a parking spot, patience is always welcome. Becoming frustrated or angry because something didn't go the way you expected does not bring anything positive tot he table and just causes the person or horse to retreat and lose trust that you can be kind.

Just remember that picking your equine partner, friends, and spouse all take good judgement, patience, and time. If you are considering buying a horse, please read my article on Tips for Buying and Selling Horses.


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